me & ...

bloom

2010-02-27T03:51:00.004+08:00

Being attached for 2 years, suddenly single life feels weird.

lol, afterall we were like glue.

No specific one that you need to call when you're awake.

No specific one that you need to meet.

Need no care about what's wrong.

I can just take care of myself!

but im getting used , i guess. i need to (:

Went to watch Little Big Soldier by Jacky Chan at westmall.

Like funny only.

And don't know why when jacky chan is crying, yh and joanna can laugh so happily!

mei you tong qing xin at allll.

i want watch this leh, anyone? (:

the webby is so cool.

http://adisney.go.com/disneypictures/aliceinwonderland/

2010-02-20T14:23:00.003+08:00

Everything has ended.

Although its been so long,

but i couldn't go on any further.

It's not your fault this has happen,

it's not because of Angie.

The problem has been there for too long,

too much to make this love survive.

Indeed we have changed, you know it too.

Don't blame anyone, including yourself.

Love can overcome everything, i agree.

but think carefully, did our love overcome anything?

Its just not gonna happen anymore,

the love once so unbeatable.

The memories created will never forgotten.

At this moment, i only wants to remember,

that we loved each other once so whole-heartedly.

Take care, my friend.

last straw

2010-02-13T09:42:00.005+08:00

heyhey its been long ya.

hmmm merry christmas, happy new year and happy huat cny alright.

abit slow but wellllll, who cares.

have been catching up with my sis (real one),

knowing that after so many years of searching,

she finally found someone who can give her happiness and everything she want.

I'm really happy for her from the bottom of my heart,

no matter how show off is she. lol~

as for friends,

well my beloved cosi pazzesco is having a hard time dealing with legal mafia,

but we did foresee it i guess... just that everyone is trying to avoid.

and that very special 2 loves , having hard time with their relationships too i guess?

just want you girls to know,

no matter what i say or did, its all for your own good.

as for my dearest,

thanks for what you did,

i know you've been trying hard.

really appreciate thou i may not mention it.

however, is something missing?

i'm not saying you did too little,

but probably our love has raises to a new level.

moreover, its been 4 years plus since we first started.

never could explain, the love.

but a little too less passion.

Let's return to 4 years back,
and remember the reason we fall in love.

2010-01-17T20:20:00.002+08:00

so envy looking at others saying bf giving in when they throw temper...
well, i'm not saying that my bf is not good,
its just that my bf thinks i shouldnt throw a temper.
probably i really should not, cos everytime i do so, he gets angry too. laughs.

i'm just a simple girl who wants to be treated like a princess.
cos i treated you like my prince.

2010-01-17T19:55:00.002+08:00

When i was young, i always think guys should love me for who i am,
and not asking me to change for god sake.
Now i'm older, i realise that's all bullshit.
Love is not the only factor to grow old together,
tolerance, understanding and blah blah blah.
If you find someone who tolerates your bullshits, well good for you, and cherish it.
If you dont, make sure your love is strong enough to tolerate his.
Maybe you love someone enough to be who they want you to be,
or you'll become someone who you dont even know.
I never thought i could be like this.
When i look into the mirror, i start to wonder who is this?

I'm old enough to know actually there's nothing you cant,
but you will.
I realised if you really love a person,
your answer would be yes, and not no i cant.
In major problems i mean.
Is it worth to say yes to someone who will say no to you?
Answer lies with you.

i would choose to die in your arms, rather than living without you.

2009-12-15T06:13:00.002+08:00

My dearest,
life would be a disaster without you.
How i wish time could stop now.
Don't bring me til the day.
I don't know what to say more; no words can describe how much i love you..

and my dearest bee, pls remember,
you always stand a greater portion.
we thought of you everyday.

whattheF

2009-12-03T00:47:00.000+08:00

Dear Mommy,
I am in Heaven now...I so wanted to be your little girl. I don't quite understand what has
happened.
I was so excited when I began realizing my
existance. I was in a dark, yet comfortable
place.
I saw I had fingers and toes. I was pretty far
along in my developing, yet not near ready to
leave my surroundings. I spent most of my
time thinking or sleeping. Even from my
earliest days, I felt a special bonding between you and me.

Sometimes I heard you crying and I cried
with you.
Sometimes you would yell or scream, then cry. I
heard Daddy yelling back. I was sad, and
hoped you would be better soon. I wondered why you cried so much.

One day you cried almost all of the day. I
hurt for you. I couldn't imagine why you were
so unhappy.

That same day, the most horrible thing
happened. A very mean Monster came into that warm, comfortable place I was in. I was so scared, I began screaming, but you never once tried to help me.
Maybe you never heard me.

The monster got closer and closer as I was
screaming and screaming, "Mommy, Mommy, help me
please! Mommy, help me." Complete terror is
all I felt. I screamed and screamed until I
thought I couldn't anymore. Then the monster
started ripping my arms off. It hurt so bad; the
pain i can never explain. It didn't stop. Oh, how I begged it to stop. I screamed in horror as
it ripped my leg off. Though I was in such
complete pain, I was dying. I knew I would never
see your face or hear you say how much you love
me.

I wanted to make all your tears go away. I had
so many plans to make you happy. Now I
couldn't, all my dreams were shattered. Though I was in utter pain and horror, I felt the pain of my heart breaking, above all.

I wanted more than anything to be your
daughter.
No use now, for I was dying a painful
death. I could only imagine the terrible things
that they had done to you. I wanted to tell you that I love you before I was gone, but I didn't know the words you could understand. And soon, I no longer had the breath to say them; I was dead. I felt myself rising. I was being carried by a huge angel into a big beautiful place. I was still crying, but the physical pain was gone.

The angel took me away to a wonderful
place. Then I was happy. I asked the angel what was the thing was that killed me. He
answered, "Abortion. I am sorry, for I know how it feels." I don't know what abortion is, I guess that's the name of the monster.

I'm writing to say that I love you and to
tell you how much I wanted to be your little girl. I tried very hard to live. I wanted to live. I had the will, but I couldn't; the monster was too powerful.

It sucked my arms and legs off and finally
got all of me. It was impossible to live. I just
wanted you to know I tried to stay with you. I didn't want to die.
Also, Mommy, please watch out for that abortion
monster.

Mommy, I love you and I would hate for you to
go through the kind of pain I did. Please be
careful.

Love,
Your Baby Girl.

fuck.

lotsa stuffs.

2009-11-10T17:01:00.011+08:00

okay... where shall i start?

did quite alot of things but i forgot the sequence. laughs.
anyway, i was over at joan's house for like the past 1 week,
went home and came out repeatedly. mom is getting used to it lol.
okay lets start with, me and dearest went to bugis V8 movie cafe and have our dinner,
i don have much appetite so i ordered a light one, but it sucks -.-, but dearest said his was sup. well, he likes it can le . (:
appetizer .
dearest half eaten sirloin steak (:
dearest: hmmmm.
my omelette.
me: tasteless~
dearest made me angry by snatching my phone.lol.
went over to edwin's place for elephant with dearest, joan, zy and dom.
nearly died at around 5plus, and they still got the mood to play truth or dare from winwin's iphone. but that night was filled with laughter thou.
went to send zy to airport. keep going hot and cold hot and colddddddddd.
did i mention i really like the feeling of the 2 crazy couples date. hahas.
if only beee can join us. hmmm..

at westmall, haha. dearest with zy, act like only

we'll miss you zy! and joanna is gonna super miss you! hahas.
back to joan's house, concussion. lol
woke up and bee came to find us.

my bee <3 joanna <3

nice? (:

slacked till 6plus, accompany joan to cck buy hicard for zy,
tancheepek! joan ran around just for you, better treat her good!
me too! must treat me good too alright sister! lol.
slept, woke up, den went to cut hair, dearest too.
he like his hair now hoho.
then, back "home" and cu! lols. bee came to find us again.
=p
after that i forgot what happened lol.
dearest keep pestering about marrying him.
well. we'll see ya. lol
he's gonna do something dangerous, i'm worry....
but he say before, he wants me to support whatever he is doing...
i hope i'm doing the right thing.

hell or heaven, i'm with you.

2009-11-05T16:10:00.004+08:00

i cant help to laugh at this pic.

Mr tan chee pek.
-
well, was over at 2nd home,
for e past 3 days.
did nothing much.
boreddd.
im missing you already.

i love you too

excited

2009-10-24T23:48:00.002+08:00

am at my 2nd home aka joan's hse
lols. waiting for zy and dear to be back,
while nana herself went to NaNa to celebrate her frens birthday.
miss you!

lotsa events

2009-10-23T12:02:00.005+08:00

well, didnt went home for the past 1 week for sleep, became joan's tenant. laughs.

at jp, donno when was it.
celebrated yanming's birthday at chevron,
had fun with sis and bros,
Happy birthday yanming! hope you enjoyed what we planned (:

anddd after that was joan's birthday!
alot of photos la, but lazy.
joan's chalet was at sentosa,
well, as expected cakes smashed and stuffs.
but most unexpected thing was... there's a pool beside the bbq pit and
i donno why.... MR Tan CHEEPEK pushed me down the pool.
Thanks huh!
and i was thinking how i can be wet when my bee is not right? (:
so.... hehe. *wink* but she was pulling my hair when we push her down, i nearly drowned.
boo.
but in the end me and my bee successfully throwing zy down to the pool.
with his gucci belt! hahahaha.

Happy 21st birthday my dear!
2 days after that, while dear went out to meet his friends,
went to watch ...

with my beee, joan and zy,
didnt understand at the beginning but when the tsunami came,
me and bee's tsunami came too.
laughs, its so funny when i took out the tissue,
1 for her and 1 for me..
welllll. its touching la.

stayed at joan's house after that meet kelly and fiona.
so... dont really remember much things that happened. laughs.
--
dear, i know everything you do, you did for me.
but...give me some time alright?
please... realise my effort would you?

4 more days... i couldn't wait.

2009-10-12T01:28:00.006+08:00

On sat, went town with ed, dom, zy and joan to look for bee and berlin.
Window-shopped awhile then left for NaNa to celebrate joan's fren,
cuiyun's birthday without bee and berlin.
we dont really quite know her thou. just to accompany joan. but still...
Happy birthday cuiyun! what a pretty and sweet lady she is (:
open martell duh.
a lil incident happened but well... lucky nothing serious happen.
thanks for that table infront of joan. HAHA!
but i have to say... tancheepek is a really good temper guy!
left at around 3plus am.
went joan's house after that.
woke up at 3plus pm.
ate "breakfast" and went to watch 2 movies at jurong point with joan, zy, calvin and germaine!

first was.....
Darah.

look at her face, dig her eyes out for me please.
well. its super bloody and gruesome.
but not really that nice thou.
followed by....
Sorority Row . beee came to join us.

hmmm. not bad.
beware of your "sister's" boyfriend ya.
lol.
its so not me to watch such movies.
2 times in a row somemore!
im feeling abit insomnia now.
shit. stupid zy!

just 4 more days, i don't wanna be alone anymore.

new look

2009-10-10T00:39:00.001+08:00

just changed my skin.
spent quite some time to reorganise it.
how is it? (:

my dad expects me to play com with no lights on.

2009-10-09T21:51:00.002+08:00

Trying to keep my blog out of spider webbies. hopefully.

Went to bugis with beee,
accompany her to an interview which need a good command of english.
hahaha.
after that just keep walking around bugis and massive smoking sessions.
just reached home after she went to meet her fatfat.
-
This is real frustrating.
Dad is complaining my usage of computer is resulting the elec bills to be $180+
well, this bill is of SEPT, where i'm working and not home all the time.
When i'm home you say i waste elec, when i'm not home you screw me.
what the fuck you want me to do?!

-Life is real hard, too hard at times for me to be able to handle.
-next friday.

2009-10-07T20:55:00.004+08:00

Finally, the day i've been waiting for,
is coming!
So excited, couldn't wait for 16 of oct.
my boy is coming back (:
Been having alot of mahjong sessions.
clubbings, chalets, sleepover and stuffs.
hehh. lots of pictures wanted to upload but lazy.
so here's some first!

Party at Neverland with my girls and boys.

Celebrated bee's birthday at ecp chalet.
super big cake but never get to eat,
all smashed on faces. including me! boo.

2009-09-16T23:56:00.001+08:00

what's with me man.

2009-09-16T23:56:00.000+08:00

what's with me man.

2009-08-16T22:40:00.006+08:00

Woo! hello everyone! say byebye to long-hair me!
lol.
Went to Mono bar with colleagues ytd. after dat powerhouse.
well, kinda fun. hee.
pictures talks.

2009-08-10T23:44:00.002+08:00

I'm really tired of being all alone!!!
No one is there to ask me out,
im always the one asking people out.
Maybe i'm just a burden afterall.
Stressful at work.
Nothing gives me a motive to continue living.
Wake up, work, go home, sleep.
hella like life.
lappy is the only companion.
i don't know what's going on.
Give me a break.

2009-07-15T01:03:00.003+08:00

Well, today morning i was listening to 88.3fm,
and they are actually introducing a book name "You're very rich; You just don't know it yet."
hmm, its writing bout they did a survey or something like that,
trying to tell people, if you're healthy you actually have 550k pounds.
and having a lover who tell you i love you means 450k pounds.
so on and so forth.
what it means?
They are trying to tell people out there,
some things you own worth alot of money,
which the wealthy might not have.
So, treasure what ever you have.
My dear friends,
be glad that you have the "friends" around you.
Don't quarrel about things which are so insignificant to kill an ant.
well, ant don't even kill each other cause of that,
so why must we?
Take something which Carina Lau always say,
Face it, Solve it, Put down, and Forget.
面对，解决，放下然后忘记。
If you could live life this way,
it could be much easier, there's no benefits to cling on something, even if its a mistake.
Forgive and forget, Everything would be simpler.

P/S, I really don't wish to see both of you like that,
the happiness in friendship is something couldnt find elsewhere,
but with the right friend.

2009-07-08T00:16:00.001+08:00

Bought Samsung Preston in violet colour (:
Totally loving it. <3

2009-07-07T23:29:00.001+08:00

好想你
（I miss you）
Hi my one and only,
这么多天没见
可是我总想起你的声音在我耳边
今天心情好吗
是否不愉快
要一切都看得开
世界没有太坏
虽然不在你身边
我的心有一条线
连着你牵着你
好想你想到愿意相信
我就闭上了眼睛你在这里
别忘记我们的约定
一直都在我心里
不管你在哪里
不要忘了我有多么爱你

不要忘了吃饭不管有多忙
不要忘了开车时候一定要往前看
其实我真的很快乐
有你一直守侯
一直走到了以后都挽着你的手
虽然不在你身边
但我在你心里面
我愿意等着你
我好想你想到不能呼吸
想到全身没力气没有关系
你别忘记我们的约定
一直都在我心里
不管你在哪里
不要忘了我有多么爱你
我也一直在这里
别忘了我有多么爱你

2009-06-15T23:24:00.001+08:00

omg!
you make me puke la bitch.
hypocrite.
yucks!

2009-06-15T22:56:00.002+08:00

zzz cant embed.
go see urself.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LniPZTtSHXU
damn cute haha!

2009-06-06T00:45:00.002+08:00

Started working!
and oh dam i love this job!
pay high, and job scope is interesting!
wanna know? hhaah.s
tell u la.
Slimming consultant at London Weight Management.
:D OKAY LA, i know im not slim.
THAT'S NOT THE MAIN POINT!
anyone wanna slim down?
anyone wanna join me as colleague?
:D

2009-05-30T02:22:00.002+08:00

im having insomnia again..
i donno why it acted up again.
im so tired, but i couldnt sleep.
i don wanna wake up in heartache, realising that it was jus a dream.
it hurts so bad....

i need no one, but you.

2009-05-24T21:17:00.002+08:00

Sunday is always the disaster day for me.
it's my dad's off day, and its a sure thing that he will get kwaytiao for breakfast for me,
hmm its been this dish for about 4months, every sunday.
and previously was chicken rice every sunday for 6months.
this is my dad, his mind will be locked for a few months before he realise that.
then after that mom would be quarreling with dad why does he go to e market so long,
go chee hong is it. you cant imagine. its happens for every sunday,
jus like how things come alive every night at the museum.
then, lil nephew would snatch tv from my dad, and they start scolding each other.
it stays like that all the way till night.
horrible.
"cleaned" up my links jus now, and added some new links.
boring!!!
i wan job!!!
i wan tio toto and 4d!!!
..............
but i don buy. -.-
boring.

2009-05-24T00:53:00.002+08:00

btw, went to watch Night At The Museum 2 with angie and joanna. hahas.
so funny.
but i still thinks e 1st one is better.
donno why like series movies always ended up 1st part is the nicest?
probably cos the first one would be so nice so people watch 2nd part... and expected too much?
humans are never contented =p
but got one part is really funny laaaaaaa.
"And i have CAME BAC.... nevermind jus pass me the tablet."
LOL. don understand? go watch!
Rating: 8.5/10

2009-05-23T18:01:00.002+08:00

okay well, recently i've finally straighten out my thoughts.
Telling myself, "you aren't going to sleep with ur mom for e future 6 months.... aren't you?"
"You should face your fear and not avoiding it. Face the fact! your boy is not going to sleep beside you for 6months!"
"And heck it! THERE'S NO GHOST IN THIS WORLD!"
so this 2 days i've been sleeping alone.
i felt like this is a very big achievement.
pls give me some compliments.
It's been a long time since i've done that.
Can you feel how proud am i?
laughs out loud.
anyway, these 2 days i've been dreaming of dear,
released and everything.
Went to the usual party and i got caught dont know becos of what!
Scenario is like,
the police say "but ur friends said that u did that!"
me: "if i were to say i saw u killing someone ytd, is that valid?" and i was thinking oh ya you can say you have witness proving you were at somewhere else. im dead this time.
police ponders* and say: "okay fine i'll let you go"
probably in my subconscious police are ****? i donno. lol.
sent like 76178936 resumes?
pleaseeeee i need a job!
i need money!

You're not alone, neither am i, cause our heart beats as one.

2009-05-21T02:58:00.002+08:00

im so disappointed.
in which a friend, once so close.
its not becos that you rejected it, its not the first time anyway,
but did i say anything at that moment?
afterall, its not an obligation to help me, i know that.
i expect to be rejected.
but never did i expect that you would totally ignore me.
what is this?
im not angry...
but disappointed.
and i repeat, not becos u rejected, but becos you IGNORED.
so disheartening.
the years spent building that friendship has just gone to waste.

What will be remembered is not the words of enemies, but the silence of friends.

2009-05-19T15:00:00.002+08:00

I miss how you would fuss over getting up earlier than you in e morning.
and not continuing to lie next to you.
I miss how you ask me to cook for you, when my condition is piggy back me to e kitchen.
I miss how you would automatically stay by my side when i cook,
and scolding me for eating too much.
I miss your reaction when i switch to a channel showing horror movies.
I miss how we always snatch our turns to play games,
and how we gave stupid reasons that why we should be the one.
I miss how you are always reaching out for my hand outside,
and strangling me if i deliberately tries to avoid it.
I miss how you scold me for being so careless.
I miss how you always get angry when your frens teasing you and i dont side you.
I miss the attitudes you would give, when i didnt mention to meet.
I miss how you would say " you look tired" when you're the one who is tired.
I miss how we would always talk about everything, anything.
I miss how you would always put your hands under my head,
hugging, and patting me to sleep.
I miss how you would kiss me goodnight without fail.

Too much thoughts, too little words.
im gonna miss all these for 6months,
i showed that im gonna be so fine.
but no.
everyday when i wake up, i wished everything was just a dream.
every night when i sleep, i hope that i wouldnt wake up.
but i cant?
im gonna stay strong till ure out.
numbing myself with all the memories every moment,
but whatever it is, it still hurts.
291105,190409

2009-05-15T14:44:00.002+08:00

no matter how i disappoint her, she still dote on me.

i feel so useless to disappoint her all e time.

and yes, i love my mom.

2009-05-13T00:24:00.002+08:00

i should have know it.

i knew how much trouble its gonna lead,

but i still didnt stop him from falling into this deep cave.

im useless duh.

dont know wtf am i doing.

failed as a girlfriend.

6months... before i can hug you again.

yea its a test, to our love.

and rest assured i will pass the test with flying colours.

afterall, besides waiting for you, what can i do?

and seriously Eric Koh Hong Lee AKA Xiaohai,

you can go die for heaven's sake.

hope you'll get a lifetime imprisonment + ghosts haunting you every night.

you fucking make false statement and push your doings to my boy.

May god has mercy on you... as i wouldnt.

2009-05-06T00:35:00.002+08:00

its been awhile folks.
how are my friends?
im in joanna's so called chalet cum lanshop which is her house.
my boy is taken away from me today.
never felt this lonely before.
even if im surrounded by friends, my life still seems so meaningless.
come back to me quick.
god bless... please dont let anything serious happen.
i love and miss you always.
P.S. he's not dead nor involve in accident, for those who is wondering.

2009-04-21T22:31:00.000+08:00

will not be posting any sooner i guess.
internet connection cut off ):
takecares. misses

2009-03-24T13:04:00.000+08:00

Please support these blogshops (:

http://inksandneedles.weebly.com

http://www.thbackalley.blogspot.com/

2009-03-19T00:43:00.002+08:00

you know what?

im going nuts?

i dont know whether life has been fair to me.

but now life is real fuck up.

lost my job and... hai...

too much things.

2009-03-10T00:23:00.002+08:00

i'm having bad hair days recently.

it makes me blue _l_.

anyway,

things are really so stressful!!!

i hope everything would come to an end soon.

i dont think anyone else is needed.

cos not even i do.

only you.

understand?

btw, its my life.

i know you guys care for me,

but im gonna live my life, according to myself.

just to tell you, im not throwing a temper here.

imma adult soon(actually im already is, just if you wanna talk officially),

so i hope you guys would respect my decision.

even if im gonna regret like how im regreting my tattoo,

i wun blame anyone.

but if you dont let me try, i would blame you.

you know how metal teeth i am,

so when i decided to do anything,

its not something that words can stop.

you know right? sis.

and work is stressing me up,

i might jump anytime(kidding),

so... stop adding up, not talking about you...

but you-know-who.

i will take care of myself alrights. (:

2009-03-06T14:34:00.002+08:00

Cut and coloured my hair (:

Befpre!

After!

heee. din waste my $190 and 3 hours in Red's i guess.

2009-03-04T23:16:00.002+08:00

i guess im going thru a rather difficult stage.

and no one is there to pick me up.

i need someone's shoulder.

anyone volunteer?

lol.

If things are going to end,

i hope you'll never forget me.

The days we spent, the things we've gone thru together.

Too much, too strong to forget.

It seems just like yesterday,

where we are still holding hands,

telling people who is breaking us,

that we're gonna be forever.

The love once going so strong,

that forever is seems too short for.

But since we have to bid goodbye,

let's hope we'll always have a space for each other in heart,

no matter who's the person is holding us next.

sucks in everything

2009-03-03T20:48:00.001+08:00

and so... i guess you still love yourself more than me. (:

nothing ever changes.

everything is so stressful.

any blogshops for intro?

2009-02-24T23:34:00.002+08:00

Quote of the day; The wise mind would not choose to secure pleasure but to avoid pain.

and im wise (:

hi guys, i've been transfer to suntec city~

find me there~

Dear, after e torture for a week, you finally know who you loved right!

please learn to treasure me.

i will too.

and gosh im so clever.

i found that girl's friendster!

lmao.

just soon if i can find her blog.

think of it....

im so angry!

pukimayou! _l_

Valentines

2009-02-13T19:58:00.002+08:00

Happy advanced Valentine's Day everyone (:

how would you celebrate ur valentines?

alone, with friends, with partner?

All along valentines to me is just a date.

Walking on the streets... holding a bouquet of flowers....

WHEN 2 out of 5 girls is oso holding is no special.

There's a saying ; Everyday will be valentines, when you found the right person.

Whether you believe it or not, i do.

I've been trying to look for this kind of feeling,

but nah, relationship has too much trouble to be like valentines.

Couples eventually can quarrel or even break up on valentines,

so... whats special?

I had a relationship ended on valentines before,

so what can i expect.

Romantic.

A word with alot of definitions.

For me, romantic is when everyone around me feels how fortunate i am,

to have that someone who loves me with all his might.

its not what he does, its how he makes me feel.

Yes i'm truly regretted i did not treasure him at e moment.

and now when i wants to start all over again,

he became another person.

It might be my fault, but i know its never his fault.

Love is a complicated thing, no one ever understands.

And its the only thing on earth, who makes people know how much it would hurt,

but still carries on.

Hope you guys have a really happy valentines.

With much love;

Michelle.

boring

2009-02-01T17:36:00.002+08:00

hi.

happy cny (:

did a countdown rave!

lmaos.

anyway, been working.

errrrrrr

jiayou work dear.

iloveyou.

2009-01-04T00:06:00.003+08:00

thanks guys.

for still concerning this mia here.

lol.

my real job has 2 off days a week leh.

i working at bugis b1 and heeren lvl 1 beside hmv la.

name: EyeQ Optical

pls help to burn down when im not there thanks.

sucha big company but cheat ppl commission.

wtf.

derrrr.

i next tues and sat off.

tues is free. ring me up if going out yea?

你想要的我却不能够给你
我全部我能给的
却又不是你想要拥有的
我们不适合也不想认输
好几次我们抱着彼此都是想要哭
你常解释这样的一切都只是开始
我觉得是所有的一切早就已结束
不想再约束不要再痛苦
下一次会有更好的情路

+//

press wrong lazy press new post again.

anyway, was at friend house heard one song.

so yanming can.

lol.

擦肩而过-宇桐非

女:爱上你是我的错可是离开又舍不得

听着你为我写的歌

好难过

如果说我说如果我们还能重新来过

不去计较谁对谁错

会怎么做

男:我从来没想过会有这样的结果

成为了彼此的过客

是爱的太少还是要求的太多

总是会觉得不快乐

曾经就算是一个吻

我们也能从寂寞中挣脱

就算用泪水换来笑容也值得

而现在就算拥抱着为何两颗心总不知所措

难道注定就这样擦肩而过

当爱情来了谁又能说我舍不得寂寞

当爱情走了谁又能说我不觉得失落

当爱燃烧过谁又能说我不觉得快乐

当爱变沉默谁又能说我过的很洒脱

meaningful (:

2008-12-28T23:54:00.001+08:00

dont know whether im doing the right thing.

anyway im kinda addicted to this song.

传说 by yoga and liu li yang.

romantic song (:

been so tired of working.

i miss you. (:

life's like this

2008-12-20T23:56:00.004+08:00

life's fine for me i guess.

as for working life.

i wanna strive hard laaaa.

i can stand being in this fucking household no more.

why noone trust and believe me like a family?

gosh. fuck it.

i love my dearest.

2008-12-10T12:45:00.001+08:00

tell me how can others be so sweet?

envy. jealous.

duh nvm.

some can live in e world of 2 while some just cant.

then whats the meaning of being ........

2008-12-02T23:39:00.001+08:00

promises are bullshits!

and why am i keep getting myself into this kind of shit.

making my life that miserable.

Is there anyone out there who can save me.

2008-11-27T01:37:00.003+08:00

started work a few days.

quite okay.

1 week 2 days off for retail line hard to find yea?

lol.

and dear, i dont despise you cos you're out of job now,

and pls remember there are alot of other jobs out there.

its not the end of the world.

can please cheer up...?

its hard for me to concentrate at work you know...

hais.

sometimes im thinking...

do u need me? or do u actually need the things i can do for you?

cos you change whenever you have something in substitute.

i donno. so confused.

gd nites.

2008-11-19T21:05:00.003+08:00

http://v.youku.com/v_show/id_XNTQwMjU1OTY=.html

this is a video of a damn fucking ccb knnb heartless father, slash his own son's eyes.
nnbbbbbbbb.
fuck. if my husband do that to my son i sure tong gui yu jin with him lol.

2008-11-19T19:15:00.005+08:00

I feel like going every place with you,

having memories in each places we go.

Take alot alot of pictures together.

and keep them in my heart.

I want to go zoo, night safari, escape, birdpark, fishing, prawning, underwater, sentosa, wild wild wet, chalet, cable car, cruise, travel, flyer ride, movies, ice skating, k box.

so many so many places.

some places you say 2 person very boring.

& you don like watching movies ; waste of time and money.

but whats about romantic?

like you know, if you think 2 person life is very bored,

then how? get 5 girlfriends and go together?

sometimes i really wish to tell you,

"stop taking those stuffs! i wan to go zoo!!!!!"

but you only want to enjoy them, fiona. kelly. esther.(note - these are not humans.)

michelle leh?(this is human.)

whenever i see ppl blogging bout where they went for their anniversary,

which restaurant they went, what present they recieve,

i feel so jealous.

but never did i blame you for that,

cause financial is a reason.

i know you will say " if i got money i oso can bring you anywher!"

but look... when you have the money...

where it goes?

im not blaming you here...

i know its partly my fault for being so lazy also.

lols.

its just a little kids-cant-get-lollipop rants.

and we're going lucky plaza tomorrow right!

i know you're working hard.

i appreciate that really.

jiayous ba. i'll be soon working hard too. (;

i still love you afterall =p

2008-11-19T15:30:00.005+08:00

oh damn why vanillia and rou cant play twilight...

arghhhh zzzz

oh mayb i should join them in xdreamer.

but i'll be starting work soon too.

so hmm no point ba.

already getting stressed up even before starting the job.

~.~

my everyday goal used to be waiting for my dear to come back home,

guess after i've started work i will be looking forward to going home and sleep everyday.

hahas.

i want money money $_$

bye buddies.

2008-11-16T11:19:00.001+08:00

wtf is wrong with friendster uh?!?!

im left with like 15 friends.

PATHETIC.

im quitting it. roar.

fan si ren.

R.I.P Kei Lok

2008-11-12T16:25:00.004+08:00

o9/11

-----

Back together lol. What's new?

Went to pick up dear from work, and pester him to bring me along to meet his fren.

aha. =p

After some transaction(lol), we took train to calvin's house,

and on the trip back, i told dear i had a audi couple but broke off when we got back,

he was fucking mad.

oh well but i manage to persuade him with my tears and stubborn hugs.

lol.

im sorry la, no next time la.

Met Vanilla, Kevan, Edwin, ZiYi, Charlene, Calvin and his campmates.

its been real long since i saw them, was quite happy.

had a party over there, althou its kinda ending when we reached lol.

dear seems very happy too. i know he is.

cos he wanted a proper rave so long.

but its so hot! Sahara desert!

Think his air con spoil or something.

dear had a lil heart to heart talk with ziyi,

his fav bro.

oh well, he's just so funny la.

went to find uncle round around 4am.

slacked at maconalds at pmall till 6+am.

took cab, home sweet home. (:

1o/11

------

Slacked at home the whole dayyyy wit dear.

11/11

------

Got a shocking news,

my friend passed away...

Not disclosing why.

Althou i donno know him well,

or even a long time,

But i know that he's one dam nice person.

He's nice to me, he's nice to everyone.

Help us run here and there without complaining nor rewards.

He's just 20....

Went to the place where he leave us,

some playground in Jurong West.

Alot of his friends were there,

Burn incense money and everything for him at 4am.

He's not my close friend, but when i see how sad is his family,

my eyes goes watery.

Everyone is calling his name....

"安心上路, 要记得回家的路..."

I wonder... how many friends will be calling for me when i die?

In memories of Ho Kei Lok.

May You Rest in Peace.

lol

2008-11-09T10:11:00.003+08:00

edited - hmm. what to say? im basically a soft-hearted person. boo.

2008-11-07T20:55:00.003+08:00

I think i really need some time too.

I'm really miserable.

Whatever i do, you don't seems to understand.

I'm tired, real tired.

You cant resist the temptation.

I cant control your desire.

Its not that i dont let you go out with your friends,

I'm more willing to allow; if you can control your spending.

I'm a failure girlfriend, i cant stop my boyfriend from spending.

I let him feel as thou he has no freedom.

Yes.

Why? Does anyone understand why?

I dont care how people see me as.

Wilful? Unreasonable? Sticky?

Whatever i've done, its for your own good.

It may let you feel breathless, but you're not the only one who feel so.

And if i dont care about you, why should i do all these?

And who the fuck in the world will care for you?

Regret when you know it.

You dont understand at all.

Lie to me for all you want, i will just act like i dont know.

Thats what you want, isnt it?

iloveyou

2008-11-05T19:09:00.002+08:00

I know it seems lifeless; for you.

To stick with me; everyday.

I want you to be happy.

Not sure whether will your happiness comes from me,

Is a little doubt.

I would probably be the last to see your smile,

but always the first to be happy for you.

Sayangssss.

2008-11-02T19:33:00.002+08:00

August

red - dont suit

bold - very suit

Loves to joke. Attractive. Suave and caring. Brave and fearless(oh dear.). Firm and has leadership qualities(being led you mean?). Knows how to console others.(Kill me if ure angry/sad, but don ask me to talk.) Too generous and egoistic. Takes high Pride in oneself. Thirsty for praises(PRAISE ME PLSSSS). Extraodinary spirit. Easily angered(VERY). Angry when provoked(try me). Easily jealous. Observant. Careful and cautious(i jus lost my money ytd). Thinks quickly. Independent thoughts(depends). Loves to lead and to be led(oh here). Loves to dream(but don do. D:). Talented in the arts, music and defense(i sing well :D). Sensitive but not petty(wow finally a way dat truly describes me, lmao). Poor resistance against illnesses(i seldom fall sick). Learns to relax(im learning o.o). Hasty and trusty(depends on you). Romantic(uh uh). Loving and caring(yes i ammmm :)). Loves to make friends(nah i'm shy :x)

im lazy to do every month. cos qi ur blog cant copy! i wrote this myself D:

为你而活

2008-10-29T18:56:00.003+08:00

Sometimes relationships are just so questionable.

Why does people wants to leave someone whom you have lived with 30 years?

What for marry when the ending is divorce?

Shouldnt you learn your partner before you vow to be with them forever?

Then why regret?

And why try to hold back someone when you dont even treasure them while they are beside you?

Too much question uh?

But some cases are exceptional thou.

Just a little feeling got from my aunt's case.

---------------------------------------------

Can we dont quarrel already, my dear?!

Really tiring.

I love you more than anyone else.

You're the only one im gonna spend my life with.

I dont want anything in between.

The first in my wanted list.

How can you say you're not wanted?

I know you have been hard working, and i still say you're not.

Sorry dear.

But when we quarrel i really feel like saying "KNN BREAK LA".

I didnt cos i know after my anger fades,

you're still my favourite hello and hardest goodbye <3

See i so xing ku wash clothes for you and got a cut on my thumb!

lol. okae la nothing great to cry about.

Being a housewife really not easy can!

Long Life Mommy!

为了你而活
为了你而梦
为了爱
我会撑到最后
当世界都乌有
守著你的人是我
为了你而活
为了你而梦
伤痕再深
心无法划破
跟命运在逆流就算错了也不退后

&- you leave me breathless.

2008-10-26T11:00:00.005+08:00

I know im in the wrong.

I've done what you prefer me to.

Still not enough?

Then whats the end?

I've been trying to mend this broken string,

Which you just leave it aside.

A fragile string is hard to hold,

It seems like it will snap anytime.

And when it snap, it breaks my heart.

It's, however, something i've been trying hard to maintain.

Its hard to know what you really wants,
When you dont even want to say.

And i feel that, if i died when we're quarreling,

You wouldnt even care.

Cos when e quarreling starts, nothing about me matters anymore.

&- do you even know what i want?

2008-10-19T13:10:00.002+08:00

Happy 6th month Anniversary baby!

We've got 2 6th month anniversary lol.

plus together 1 yr liao yay!

ok, childish.

But i know we wun end it like the last time right? (:

Althou its just 6 months but we've been thru alot!

really alot.

we run away together, suffer together, enjoy together, went crazy together.

so many so many!

It's really alot of mixed emotions having you here.

Sad, angry, worried, jealous, lonely, fun.....

but nonetheless(at least now), im really happy!

You're the most precious thing(excluding mommy) in my life now.

Never let go? I promise (:

and, and, im going to kbox later~

its been so long since i last went!

sooo looking forward.

CYA BUDDIES.

但愿天下有情人终成眷属! (:

2008-10-16T22:08:00.002+08:00

now adays cohabiting in trend?

lol. no idea.

probably love is in e air~

haiyaaa so envy people can double-date traveling!

i oso wish i can have a short getaway~

don need too far la.

genting can liao. hahas.

my mom is quarreling with dad for me again.

i, HO POH YIN MICHELLE, promise, i will never ever send my mom to folk's home!

thats for unfilial freaks yeah. _l_

kinda agitated. lols. cos think of e movie "Money Not Enough 2".

I CRIED LIKE #$%^!&*.

however i imagine if my mom were to be sick like this,

hella. i will die with her.

SO MOTHERLY LOVED lol.

Although she always scream at me for nothing,

always disturb me when im not having a gd mood,

always say imma bitch(haha).

but she's still the one who will give me anything i really wish,

even it causes her life.

oh well, whenever i think how a failure daughter i am,

to have sucha a wonderful mother whom i cant take care of,

makes me weep.

too bad i didnt listen to her, i should have fucking continued my studies.

hais,

Life is Full of Regret-ness.

adios.

2008-10-16T13:15:00.002+08:00

The person im most grateful with, is my mom;
The person i disappoint most, is my mom.
why?

&- i hate hypocrites.

2008-10-16T11:10:00.002+08:00

previous post not done by me =o

Recently got so many things happened,

gone crazy that night.

How i wish i could share it with someone else...

but... how to say sia?

I only can say.... KELLY`s FAULT.

forget it.

Boy, Will you ever know how much you meant to me...?

But i know you love me like no one else do.

Im sorry for the stress my close ones have been giving to you.

Whenever i see how you face them makes me heartache.

I dont wanna see you like this, but i dont wanna be apart with you too.

Words couldnt express how i feel.

Lets strive, for our better day.

From now on, there`s only 2 of us. No one else. I hope.

There`s so much things.... too much.

2008-10-15T19:45:00.002+08:00

I love you dear !

2008-10-11T15:35:00.004+08:00

Got some shockening news from Thomas, hahas.

Went to drink with Thomas and LaiFa on wed's night.

Mayb its been so long since he last talked to us,

HE`s SO TALKATIVE.

Can understand his feelings thou...

but he doesnt listen to me! Frustrating.

lol. My dear...

STOP SAYING I WILL RUN FOR THAT KIND OF

"HANDSOME, RICH and GOT CAR" guys.

I WUN! if so, i might not be with you already.

bleah. or mayb i will if u still dont treat me nice.

HAHA. but like i said la.

if they have this kind of quality, they wun even lay their eyes on me.

they will go for CELESTINA. ur fav "chio-bu" orights.

Yesterday, go safra play billard.

sians life. ):

Maple
Rebirthed! now am a 172 NL! hehh.

CUTE RIGHT.

at least i think so. =p

2008-10-06T18:10:00.018+08:00

woohoo!

yeterday was sunday, so... family outing!

went to east coast using sis's bf car.

and the thing u will think of when mention east coast?

...

....

ride bicycle!

hehh. so long nv ride bicycle...

kinda phobia after that incident at last yr's chalet lol~

i didnt fall down this time! (:

sis was skating, me and ma, pa, tat & lil morphe riding.

morpheus is sooo funny. we 5 ppl were like bodyguard luh.

staying beside him scare he fall down.

got one part is like, he going down slope,

and he couldnt control. i was infront of him..

and he shouted

"AH YI!!! I... VERY... FAST...!!

FASTER RUN!!!!"

i LMAO. yea. lol.

mom & dad was chasing each other,

and mom even challenged dad to race.

before they set off, my mom "secretly" tell me,

"let him pi bo yan!" like lol?

my parents are so cute and lovely, arent they? (:

finish cycling and i saw some activity going on,

so i went to check it out...

...

so many dogs....

bubbly.

& yea, it turned out to be an event for SPCA!
sooo many dogs omg! sooo cute laaaa.
got some big like teddy bear like dat!

queen with coat? o.o?

Huskey! sis's fav.
.
..
...
&- TADAH!!
here comes my favvvvvvvvvvvvv.

Golden Retriever!!!!!!
❤
❤
❤
❤
❤
❤
so handsome leiiii. damn.

sisters forever! (sounds childish. but its true wat.)

❤ mommy!

HAHA. lil morpheus say... "i wish ah da was here".
me too dearest. (:

someone's wondering why he didnt get to play water.
-
after dat we went to eat, now than i know there's a food court at east coast.
ate bbq chicken wingsssss. like fav can. ❤chicken den they ate some stuffs i don eat one.
like sambal sotongs and stuffs.
wanted to take more pics but mom's fone batt flat. thx to me.
and my fone is "5 megapixels". so no point.
after eating, went walking on the beach.
den saw this.
very mian qian de use my "5 megapixels" camera took it
its some "build-a-castle" thingy.
i guess it should be "build-big-castle".

see what i mean?
after that went to bugis to fetch that attitude guy.
ya my dearrrr. he's so lovely! yea...

a lil something for you guys.

Save Tonight - Eagle-Eye Cherry

goodbye east coast.
❤

2008-10-01T02:29:00.003+08:00

i know myself.

thats my limit.

we've been staying like this for months.

im really tired.

i've been living in those empty promises for months.

i try to do everything i can. anything.

i couldnt take it anymore.

everything is my fault. yea mine.

have you ever put myself in ur shoes?

sorry for concerning u too much.

well, it hurts to hear "you care so much for wat?"

who am i actually means to you.

i shouldnt be caring?

den well, i wun. anymore.

im more disappointed then sad.

its time to set myself free.

dont wanna live ur cage anymore.

and well, i realise, my frens will be with me;

if i let them to.

Thanks Ben and Xian, ur dirty talks,

althou not funny. but still, made me cheer up.

love these buds.

*cassy laopo.... i finally know how you felt a yr ago.

teach me to be strong (:

love is always the illusions;

you make for it.

2008-09-29T01:24:00.004+08:00

today is a quarrelling day duh, since yesterday.

he's off today.

woke up in e morning, played maple awhile, den we went to get ready.

went downstairs. and started to quarrel that he say i wear too little.

so i went up to change my clothes, just anyhow changed to a long sleeve one, when he walked away to redhill mrt.

den i go to redhill mrt to meet him. and he gave a comment like

"why you never wear nicer?" i was fucking irritated.

imagine u wear something u like, and got scolded, and u changed to meet e "requirement",

and still, got a kind of comment like this.

tears rolled down my cheek, duh. i didnt want to let him saw it.

so i walk another way.

in the journey, we never say anything to each other. just like a stranger.

how cute, huh.

den he went home and change and stuffs.

after that i ask him where are we going now,

and we start quarreling again. he say if i wanna ignore him, den might as well i go home.

im not trying to ignore him. just didnt want to let him say i act ke lian.

anyway, my explaination forever doesnt take effect.

whenever i tok nicely to him, he would say something nasty.

till i really cannot make it. breakdown.

lol cried like a crazy women in e mrt.

perhaps i should just jump down.

end of quarreling.

den we went bugis to meet calvin, edwin &fren and minghui.

mayb he is even nice enough to buy thing for me to eat

calvin was doing his tattoo on e hand.

went walk around and get back home.

hais.

where's the confidence i used to have in this relationship?

2008-09-27T22:18:00.000+08:00

Promises is meant to suck balls.

2008-09-25T17:20:00.004+08:00

dear started work a few days le, hope he will get used to his job.
strive hard. iloveyou (:

Am playing maple private server for these few days.

http://www.twilightms.com/

rates are 500x exp, 500x meso, and 10x drop.

woooaaa. =p
lol, & yea cos i don have patience like raven LOL.
3 days and i get to lvl 183 lol~
still can get even more, just that even in private server,
im still lazy to train.
but theres something quite fun thou, Rebirth.
it means u can change to other jobs starting from lvl 1 when ure lvl 200.
so example, if u're a lvl 200 bishop and u rebirth to a nl,
u became lvl 1 but u'll still have bishop's skills.
and rebirth is unlimited. the top ranking crazy guy, rebirthed 21 times.
i wonder if there're so many jobs to change to.

and so ytd dear off, we wanna save money so we decided to stay home.

that idiot was sitting infront of the com e whole day.

NOTE: its really the whole day. (+night) playing maple.

i trained his char to 85 previously, and he train himself to 186,

using the whole of his off day.

i remember he used to say im stupid to spend my offday at home playing games.

AINT YOU TOO MR LEE.

while we're lying on the bed, he still can ask me "what job should i rebirth to?"

boo. maple overwhelms.
take care buds.

don jealous LOL. dragon weapons are dam easy to hunt at skele =3

Happy Birthday Angie. (:

2008-09-17T23:48:00.003+08:00

me and dear went to cut our hair today.

he like nv cut hair b4... so anxious. lol. it turned out orite thou.

looks not much difference lol.

dear has an interview tml at tan boon liat building.

anyone know where's dat?

cos we fucking finding it at chinatown and it ended up at tiong bahru.

=.=''_l_ but oh fine, we didnt have enough time to tiong bahru anyways.

went to watch The Days with dear, adrian &his gf and tony &his gf (jasmine).

http://www.thedaysmovie.com/

made in singapore, true life story. paikia storyline about 2 brothers.

not much surprising stuffs. all kinda predicted. bleah.

but when we're out we saw one of e leading actor in dat show, and we shouted "eh! baby lei!"

(cos his name in e show was baby. *silent....*)

and adrian wanted to take pictures with him.......................................

you think he andy lau meh.

went walking around ps, den we saw tony's ex gf, who's name is also jasmine. LOL.

wat an embarrass scene.

den took train go batok, ate stingray!

den had a fight with him ): i hate it.

i donno whats right or wrong, cos im always wrong.

oh dear, i didnt want things to happen this way.

sometimes i really wish to tell you,

can we just change our temper for the sake of e rest of our life?

cos i know, giving in doesnt seems so hard like before,

if its for e sake of our happiness.

but you don seem to think that way.

if you think im e only one you wanna spend the rest of ur life with,

then cherish is what you needa do.

im trying my very best. can you see?

can you talk nicely whenever we quarrel?

we promised... remember?

ure my last boy, and im ur last girl.

i wouldnt wan to stay like this forever.

please? ):

Monsoon - Tokio Hotel. i love it.

2008-09-13T19:41:00.002+08:00

was down with fever last 2 days.

thanks dear.

i wan to turn over a new leaf.

and yes, hope i can..

i donno if you can, but i must can.

i cant carry on like this, neither u can.

if u can think on ur age, u should know.

living like this is meaningless. i wan to do something for myself.

i wan to be like few months ago, spend like noone fucking cares.

no *****. not anymore.

B4 its too late.

(:

2008-09-07T23:10:00.002+08:00

and yes mayb ure right.

what im good at....

im good at losing myself in loving you (:

been no answer of a target i should have now,

anyone can tell me what i should go for now?

i need a job, yes.

any intro plsss? any will do.

just to have a job and get my ass time lesser in this house will do.

everyone is pushing me to a end, a hopeless end.

no one ever thinks for me, no one i can depends on.

who's the one where i can tell my sorrows to.

answer; my bloggy. (:

&- ps. iloveyou.

move on.

2008-09-02T04:05:00.002+08:00

i guess everything is just a hangover.

gotta learn to move on, be strong, stand up and don fall again.

its just retribution. i believe in dat.

everything changes for a reason, don question mine,

its ur choice.

i need someone who i could depend on,

a pair of eyes which could capture all my expressions,

a pair of ears which could hear all my sorrows,

a shoulder which i could cry on,

the love; greater than ever.

2008-08-28T15:28:00.002+08:00

sometimes i wonder, does anyone ever listen to me?

get my words into their fucking brain?

and why should i trust they did?

cos even my fucking close ones did not.

time will drift us apart, you will tear me apart.

lol.

i just hope you will actually feel what im going thru and love me like how you claim.

keep going thru the same situation isnt fun at all.

i want to stable, stable down.

HELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL.

2008-08-28T00:41:00.003+08:00

woo yea. welcome me back (:

im fine.

i miss you guys orights!

im soooooooo tired of everything.

release me plssssss.

going to agency tml with vanilla.

i wan find work! any introoooooo?

you'll never know how much pain you've put me through.

2008-08-27T14:25:00.000+08:00

finally finish doing my blog. (:

out for interview.

be back later~!

Im fucking tired.